My Other Family

I have a family that I did not choose.  I was born into the Johnson family—on both sides!  My mother was a Johnson.  When I was born, my mother made the birth announcement to say, “Johnson and Johnson has a new product!”  I did not choose that option (no one does at birth).  They choose to put me in that family.

Physical families are composed by parents who choose the members.  Most families have children by birth; they choose to bring children into the world.  Other families have children they have adopted into their family.  In both cases, the parents chose the children to be in their family.

But, I have another family.  It is a family that I chose.  I chose to be a part of this family because they have the same basic mindset that I do.  They agree with me on the membership requirements.  We all came into this family in the same way.  Jesus called it a new birth (John 3:3, 5).

This family agrees with me on the proper organization of the family (I Timothy 3:1-13).  They agree with me about the way we approach worship as a family (John 4:24).  They agree with me about how the work of the family is funded (I Corinthians 16:1-2).

There is another guiding principle.  It is a principle that Paul wrote to the church at Corinth.  He wrote these words in I Corinthians 1:10, “Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.”

Now, consider this as a way of understanding how to choose a church.  You choose a relationship with a family when you choose a church.  The guiding principles for this choice are much the same as the guiding principles for choosing a relationship for marriage.

First, consider your uncompromisables.  These are the things that you will not sacrifice for anyone at any time.  The first set of beliefs that I mentioned above are my spiritual uncompromisables.  I have chosen these because I believe God already made them uncompromisables.  Any church family that I choose must have these things in common with me or they will not be my family.

The guiding principle from I Corinthians 1:10 speaks to the second principle when choosing a family relationship—compromisables.  It is an uncompromisable that my family must be united, but I know that there are ways that we can compromise to create that unity (without compromising the uncompromisables).

A final guiding principle for choosing a family relationship is the inconsequentials.  These are things that just don’t matter at all.  I have no affinity for or opposition to them.  They will not come into play as I am choosing my family relationship.

It is important that we do not confuse these.  We dare not allow uncompromisables to become compromisables.  We dare not allow inconsequentials to become uncompromisables.  If we do, we will be under the same rebuke that Paul gave in Galatians 1:6-7, “I marvel that you are turning away so soon from Him who called you in the grace of Christ, to a different gospel, which is not another; but there are some who trouble you and want to pervert the gospel of Christ.”

— Mike Johnson